R.I.P. Jonny Cigar (1893 - 2007).
Jonny Cigar. 1894 - 2008.
April fools!
Jonny’s not dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But, dang Frank, I’ve been busy. I’ve been thinking of funny lines, like this one:
“Yeah, I made my millions selling photocopiers in the South of Italy.” You think I’m joking? Get ova heer while I break-a you face!
High Five!
Listen: Jesus said, “Take this and drink from it, it is the cup of my blood, the blood of the new and everlasting convenant, it shall be shared for you and for all.” And I’m telling you, every time I have a glass of red wine, I can’t help but point out the tight, yet prevalent notes of Jesus Blood and sometimes, Jesus Feet. If Jesus ever wants his own winery he should talk to Robert Foley about his labels, because dang, Bob sure knows his corn beef and grits.
But enough about turpentine. I was reading the bible last night and did you know that Pharaoh said, “Every son that is born ye shall cast into the river, and every daughter ye shall save alive.”? Who would name their son or daughter “ye”? I hope he was talking about the river Jordan. My good friends, the jazz singers, always sang about a river Jordan and going to down in the river to pray. As much as they sang and begged and cried over it all I wouldn’t so much as wade near the banks, lest I dirty my fine Italian-leather handmade, gnocchi-styled boots.
Go away: I need your opinion like I need a hole in my head.
Wait: I was only fooling. Remember that time we all went to that party and all these little girls kept laughing at us but we drank way more than them anyway? One day, we’ll all be the President of the United States of Africa.
Warm Regards,
Kevin Doyle
Jonny Cigar
